Change of Perspective

I am so thankful that God's timing is perfect and beautiful.  In our darkest moments he brings people into our lives to breathe breaths of fresh air.

The past few weeks have been really rough.  We have had to live with so much uncertainty and heart ache that at moments it feels like I just might break.  When we began this journey I never in a million years thought we would be where we are now.  I have found myself asking why, why, why...trying to make sense out of any of it.  For a while, if I'm honest, I have been a little bit bitter about that.  I even found myself saying, "If we had only known there was a cousin we would have never said yes."

Today, I feel so ashamed for letting those words escape my lips.  The reality is given the information we had at the moment there is no way we would have ever said no.  I truly believe the process was completely a God thing.  I know that we have a ton of people praying for us, and that brings so much joy to my heart.  Nothing that has happened, or will happen, is outside the will of God.  I know this because, for one, God is faithful and is sovereign, and two, we have countless friends and family praying for the situation. 

What I realized today, is that I would do this all over again if meant I got to have this little man in our lives.  Because what someone told me is true...love is worth the pain.  I would walk across fire for this boy and endure any amount of heart ache.  I think today I became a mother.